A bachelor party also called a stag party in the UK, is a standard party held for a groom as he celebrates his last days as a single man. It is traditionally planned by the groom’s friends and attended by men only. A typical bachelor party involves a night or a weekend full of wild partying—strip club, gambling in a casino, consuming lots of alcohol, and hiking.
There a couple of benefits to having a bachelor party. They include:
- It’s a time for male friends to bond in spaces they consider safe. Men gossip just as much as women.
- It is also a celebration of friendship and brotherhood.
- The groom and his party get to unwind from the stresses of wedding planning.
- The groomsmen show support for the groom and help him transition into marriage.
But before you get too ahead of yourself on planning or attending one, here is a comprehensive guide on everything you need to know about bachelor parties.
What is the point of a bachelor party?
Interestingly, bachelor parties date back to the 5th century BC, when the ancient Spartans were the first to celebrate a groom’s last night as a bachelor. Since then, the celebration became more popular as a Western tradition.
A bachelor party is a celebration hosted by a group of close male friends for a groom. The idea of the party is to celebrate the end of single-hood and the beginning of married life. In many traditional and modern societies, marriage is a significant rite of passage accompanied by a change in social status, hence the celebration.
The men do things they consider fun, from laid-back activities such as fishing, hiking to wild things such as raving, adult games, casinos, strip clubs, and hard-drinking.
Who plans a bachelor party?
Typically, the best man and the groomsmen take on the responsibility of planning the bachelor party. The groom is not allowed to organize his party. However, in modern times, depending on the groom’s choice of activities, some minimal involvement may occur. Also, anyone else close to the groom can plan the bachelor party with the groomsmen’s participation.
How long before the wedding should a bachelor party be?
If you go by movie plots, they will have you thinking bachelor parties happen the night before the wedding. But bachelor parties should be between one and four months before your wedding. You should not do it too early before the couple sets the wedding date, and you should not also do it too close to the wedding day. It may interfere with the schedules of the actual day. The last thing you need is an outraged bride and a groom with a hangover.
Who pays for a bachelor party?
The groom usually does not pay for the bachelor party. It is typically a contribution made by his close friends and attendees. But the groom can contribute in some instances where the party involves traveling. He can pay for his airfare and boarding. But the groomsmen take care of most of the expenses in a bachelor party while choosing to share the costs is the groom’s choice.
Who to invite to a bachelor party?
The bachelor party’s guest list should be left to the groom, while the invitations are the planner’s job. Most times, men are the only ones who attend these parties, but the groom may invite close female friends and relatives on some occasions. Some guests to consider inviting may be the fathers- both the groom’s father and bride’s father. It would be courteous to ask them but clarify that you may or may not want them to stay for the wild part.
This kind of party may change the group’s dynamics, but that all that matters is what the groom wants.
So who do you not invite to the bachelor party? People not on the guest list, who don’t get along with the groom or aren’t guests of the actual wedding. Ask the groom before adding someone to the guest list of the party. The bottom line is; the groom dictates the attendance list.
What happens at a bachelor party?
Until recently, bachelor parties were classy black-tie dinners usually hosted by the groom’s father. In modern times, the events are wild and full of perversion. Every bachelor party is a little different, but they should involve the groom’s interests or reflect his personality.
Recent bachelor parties tend to include male-bonding activities such as over-drinking, club-hopping, visiting strip clubs, hiking, car-racing, going to casinos, and fishing. Anything goes when it comes to bachelor parties, including sexual acts; favorably, there’s usually a code of silence among the attendees. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and that most certainly applies to bachelor parties.
How long are bachelor parties?
Bachelor parties tend to last one to two days. But destination parties may take up to five days and also require more planning time. These parties can be very costly and wild, so the more days you spend, the more money it will cost you.
Therefore, it all depends on how extravagant you want it to be and if all the attending can afford it.
Is it okay not to have a bachelor party?
It’s entirely normal for a groom not to want a bachelor party. The idea of one is to make him happy, so do not force the idea on him. There are a couple of reasons why a groom wouldn’t want a bachelor party like; to save money or if the couple has been together for a long time. A good option can be hosting a small and calm hang out.
Can you cheat on your bachelor party?
Bachelor parties have always had a bad reputation. Answering this question also depends on what one defines as cheating. Cheating may also be conceptualized as the extent of the activities from reasonably harmless to full-blown sex acts.
Legally, cheating is only applicable in the confines of marriage, but because there is a code of silence regarding the event’s details, infidelity still applies. Therefore, even with the bride’s permission, most grooms engage in various sexual acts that you may consider cheating during their bachelor parties. Ironically, research also shows that few grooms intentionally plan to have actual sex at their bachelor parties and usually happens from a mix of alcohol, drugs, and pressure from the groomsmen.
Additionally, considering modern liberal relationships such as open-marriages, cheating on your bachelor party is very subjective. Still, it’s important to remain respectful to your spouse’s limitations are on the subject.
Can a married man go to a bachelor party?
Yes, married men can and should attend a bachelor party. The intention is to have male friends bonding over the marriage rite of passage. Not all bachelor parties are about sex, but if the opportunity presented itself, the married men are usually responsible for the groom. They help to keep the groom in check without watering down the fun.
Can I plan my bachelor party?
It is custom for the groom’s closest friend to organize the bachelor party. It is not common, but sometimes the groom may be allowed to take on some planning responsibility. The idea is to unburden the groom to put more effort into planning for the actual wedding.
Can I take gifts to a bachelor party?
Traditionally, the groom doesn’t expect bachelor party gifts, but it is accepted and also thoughtful. Bachelor parties are more about activities and not gift-giving like at bridal showers. If you do choose to take a gift, here are some amusing and practical gift ideas for a groom-to-be:
- Gag gifts such as funny t-shirts or blow-up dolls.
- Elegant gifts such as a pocket watch, leather wallet, cigars, expensive alcohol.
- An experience like a vacation, a gym membership, skydiving, or spa treatment.
Bachelor party packing list
Men tend to pack lighter than women, but there are a variety of things you should not forget to pack for a bachelor party. Some of these things may vary depending on the activities of the party. So here’s the ultimate bachelor party packing list:
Clothes- Always carry a change of clothes, even for a one night party. These parties can get wild sometimes, and you may need to change clothes, such as clean shirts, trousers, swimsuits, jackets, sunglasses. You can also carry a party costume if it is required.
Shoes- Do carry activity-appropriate shoes, such as hiking boots or flip-flops for a swimming party, and also wear your most comfortable shoes.
Documents- Documents are essential for any destination party, and missing any of them can downright stop the event. Triple check the following documents and ask the group to do the same to avoid any inconveniences.
- Debit and credit card
- Driver’s license
- Flight tickets
- Insurance passes (medical and travel)
- ID card or passport
- Cash
- Trip itinerary
Alcohol- You can always pack your alcohol and any legal drugs if allowed.
Toiletries- These things may be needed when you have to stay overnight. They are; toothbrushes, toothpaste, sunscreen, bug spray, deodorant, body lotion.
Miscellaneous things- Games, digital camera, phone chargers, painkillers, condoms
Check this too: Bachelorette Party 101: The Rules and Etiquette
What should you not do at a bachelor party?
There are a few things that one shouldn’t do at a bachelor party; they include:
- Do not plan something most of the guys cannot afford. It is polite to be budget-friendly unless it is all catered.
- Do not invite anyone not listed on the guest list, including the bride and groom’s fathers.
- Do not include activities that may offend the bride.
- Do not partake in illegal activities such as unauthorized hunting or illicit substances.
- Do not get obnoxiously drunker than the groom.
- Do not humiliate the groom or put him in danger.
The best man and the groomsmen should make sure the bachelor party mirrors the groom’s interest. It usually involves male-bonding activities such as bar-hopping, outdoor activities like hiking, golfing, and sometimes strip clubs. The bachelor party should be about responsible fun and unforgettable memories of a groom and his friends celebrating his last night or weekend being single.